Day 19

Wednesday; More PT (and standing), Carrie Visit (fixed her hair), Mirna Visit, almost Debbie call. Bank visit (me).

Wednesday; More PT (and standing), Carrie Visit (fixed her hair and she was over the moon), Mirna visited, we were going to do a Debbie call, but she got tired and cranky and decided to de-stimulate. I visted my Bank and they were all so fantastic/supportive (they've been following Melissa, and love her).

ℹ️ Info

Created: 2023-03-08

🗒️ Note:
The website was acting up. (It wasn't showing up all the days in the journal, just the latest 2). I talked to the hosting provider about it; they sometimes upgrade, and sometimes the database just poops the bed. They got it fixed and all the sub-articles (fragments) started showing up again.

2023-03-08 (Wednesday) - Carrie Visit, almost Debbie Call. Bank Visit.

Carrie Visit

Melissa was so happy that Carrie stopped by and hacked/combed/tugged out the her dred-head matt-in-the-back, and gave her a loose top-knot instead. Carrie mentioned how much progress she'd seen since last week (and how much chattier she was). I think one of the areas hit, was the brain-mouth filter. She can talk. (But I like it). She also said she wanted to be better by June. So she is getting scale and difficulty. (I’m hoping for quicker).

Carrie helped de-tangle the mop of hair)

Mirna Mirna was the angel that gave Melissa CPR, and is carpooling Mary in to visit w/Melissa before my meetings are over. She also did a Bayou run with some of the Kingwood running group in Melissa's name, and gave Melissa a medal, which she delighted over.

Debi was going to call

Her friend Debi had given her a new blanket, and Melissa was sporting it with her new do. But later in the day went downhill mood wise. Melissa was comprehending the scale of recovery. So it was a harder late day. She agreed she is ready to work hard, but loves her life and wants it back… but she was pretty emotionally burned out/frazzled, so opted out of the call.

Melissa got a blanket from her "long time" friend Debi and was sporting it today, along with her new do (top knot). (When they met, Nixon was still President).

Bank Visit My company is having problems with the mysteries of auto-Deposit. So I deposited a check manually, and visited my branch (I love those folks). They've all been following the saga and praying for Melissa (we're all friends). And they were so nice, curious and supportive. (Lisa especially). We hugged it out. I decided to skip the Bourbon tasting event they were doing (and opted for completing chores and going to bed by 8:00). But thanks to Nyquil (my sleeping drug of choice), I got 8 hours. (Going to work on healthier alternatives as this stuff gets worked out).

Worry Wart

This isn't about Melissa but her Husband. You can't help worrying. I'm so grateful for the progress I keep seeing, and delighted in the present. Sincerely awesome, and I'm happy with what I have and if it stopped tomorrow, I'd be grateful to still have her here. But I'm also thinking about all the things still to do to improve her quality of life; I'm a Program Manager (ex engineer) -- here's the feature list before we go live (take her home in Beta form) and ship (release her to the public).

So every step is a little celebration. And gives me the opportunity to start worrying about the next thing. Like: ✅ Whew her large motor skills are improving. She has control of both arms and legs more, and they're stronger. That should mean at least house mobility. And worse case, a scooter for public. But we're getting some hand skills (gripping), and sensitivity (she can feel me hold her hand). ⭕ Fine Motor Skills, not yet there yet. She can't manipulate remotes, can't grab things in 3-dimensional space yet. Is still in the MS kind of wandering/positioning. ✅ Vision; whew. She can see. But she can see me, not her mom sitting next to me. But if she looks at her mom, she could see her, and not me. So some peripheral limitations, and so on. ⭕ Her brain compute on processing images isn't all there yet. She can see me, but then will see me without arms. Or she'll see things that aren't there (a wall with a TV looks like a parking garage). She can see objects like a can of soda, and think it's a jar of preserves. This is all part of rehab and retraining the brain. So I think things like, "she can get this down for everyday life... but will she get back the visual compute power and reflex skills to ever drive again?". Again, delighted that I have her, and progress. But of course I worry about limitations on things that I know we won't know about for another few weeks (or more). ✅ Swallow/Eating; she can eat. ⭕ But she doesn't like the few hospital choices she has, so they keep the feeding tube in, because she's not consuming enough on her own. And Melissa being stubborn with her eating habbits is nothing new. But I want her to get past this, so she can get the tube out, and advance in Rehab. ✅ Bathroom - she can poop or not poop at will. Even with an audience. (This is a new skill). ⭕ But her urinary stuff seems to require catheterization. I think that can be the drugs she's on. But of course, I'd love an incontinent Melissa, and am grateful for where she is (and this is way too early to truly worry about this stuff). But I don't want her to have to worry about catheters/etc. Hopefully, she doesn't get too pissed off, at my over-sharing. So a week ago I was worried about would she be able to communicate at a rich enough level. Even though she has ephasia, her communication skills have improved enough, and I have confidence enough in rehab that this will keep getting better. (Whew). And that's MAJOR to her quality of life. And a week ago I was worried if she could ever walk. Now I'm seeing her stand, and thinking that walking mastery is just a matter of time/retraining... so I worry about more fine motor skills and driving on her own. (Not that I mind being Uber). It's just what worry-wart husbands do. And of course, normally, I can share my fears/concerns with my life-partner and beloved wife... but in this case that's not the slightest bit constructive. If I've learned one thing in 29 years of Marriage, it's that sharing a feature list of things your partner can do to improve themselves, is NOT the path to marital bliss. So for now must bottle that in, share with friends, or strangers on the Internet. And she'll look back on this someday and chuckle, knowing me/my nature, and scoffing at me ever doubting that SuperGirl would reacheive mastery of all these tasks.

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